Why I’m Choosing To Homeschool My Daughter
If you lived in our home you’d have heard the many conversations that my husband and I have had over the past few years. If you follow me on twitter you may have seen my tweets over the past week about how soon we’ll be starting to homeschool our daughter. This wasn’t something that we’ve just up and decided to do.. it’s been years of contemplating what is going to be best for our daughter.
I will be honest. I love my quiet days when the children are at school and I’m actually a little nervous about what I’m about to take on. Shortly after moving here to this city we realized that the school zone we were in wasn’t the best. It’s been many things over the past few years that have convinced us that this might possibly be the best option for our daughter. Aside from the school district itself we’ve noticed many things that have bothered us. My daughter is smart.. and when I say smart I mean that she’s one of the smartest in her grade in her school and has consistently been so since the first grade. Only now, the other “smart” kids who’s parents are obviously smarter than us moved their children to charter schools last year that have an amazing reputation and their children are learning the basics along with the not-so-basics and their children are thriving and happy. My daughter isn’t unhappy but she’s not learning much and she’s starting to seem a little bored and by “a little” I mean I’m surprised she hasn’t poked her own eyes out during class time. I’m not sure why but our school is seriously stuck on this whole reading thing. I’m not exaggerating when I say this either. I’m well aware that there are children in her school who still haven’t got it figured out yet but it’s like my daughter is being held back because of these children instead of being able to move on and learn other important things. They’re in the third grade for goodness sake! She gets it! She’s gotten it for years! She’s years ahead of her game now and it just can’t get better so I’m not sure what is going on and it’s killing me. This school year seems to be challenging her less and less and I’m not sure why. I would love for her to be able to spend more time learning other subjects such as math, science, and other subjects they seem to be skimming over and she’s completely on board with this. She loves to learn and wants to learn more. I want her to have that opportunity.
While those are the main reasons I do have other reasons for not being very impressed with her current school. For instance, when my daughter has a sore throat and needs a drink of water. She will NOT ask for a drink. Why? Because the kids who ask for a drink have to pull a stick. What does this stick mean? 5 minutes off their recess time that they have to sit at their desk. Same thing when the kids have to use the restroom. She’ll hold it until she gets home. I’m not sure why things that are a necessity to life seem to be treated as if it’s something bad and the children are getting punished for it but I’m just not really thrilled with this whole idea. They need a new system for bathroom and drink breaks yet it’s been like this for the past two years.
Now let me tell you about the cranky old lady who works at my daughter’s school. I think she’s a child-hater. She’s a cold woman who never smiles. She’s not happy with her job and you can see it by the way she gives everyone a dirty look.. even us parents. She’s constantly yelling at someone and I’m convinced her face could break if she attempted to crack a smile. I can’t think of many that are brave enough to stand within 10 feet of her for fear she might eat them alive. The kids all hate her. The parents can’t stand her. We parents that have had enough call to voice our concerns to the principal, he talks to her, yet nothing ever happens. She must be great friends with someone in the school board because that HAS to be why she still has a job. This year she was brave enough to scream at my daughter and got within a foot of her face and her best friend’s face. It wasn’t warranted. These girls did absolutely nothing wrong. Mrs. child-eater decided that she didn’t like the mess that was on the third grade class lunch table and when the entire line ignored her freakish shrieking she decided to take it out on my daughter and her friend. She got her wish though, my daughter and her friend were forced to clean the third grade table even though the mess wasn’t theirs. Yes, people like this are working with our children… raising our children and it’s not okay yet it does happen.
So it comes down to the fact that I want my daughter to have more opportunity to learn.
- When she gets a concept and understands something I don’t want her to be held back because the other kids are still learning something over a matter of weeks or months that should by all means have been mastered within days or weeks.
- I’d like for her to be able to move on to the next concept when she gets it and to constantly be learning instead of bored out of her mind.
- I don’t want her not feeling well because she didn’t get to go to the bathroom all day or miserable because she has a little cold and can’t get a drink of water.
- I don’t want people like Mrs. child-eater influencing the person that my daughter grows up to be and I don’t want to be responsible for tearing this woman a new one should she ever mess with my child again.
This isn’t about me, it’s not necessarily about anyone else, it’s really all about my daughter. As her parent it is my job to ensure that she is getting what she needs and that includes an education that is the kind of education she needs. Maybe in time we’ll find that homeschooling for her isn’t necessarily the best option. If that’s the case I’m completely open to that possibility and if needed I will be getting her on the waiting list for the charter schools or looking into schools that have a good reputation within a different school district. But for now, we’ll be spending the remainder of our school year homeschooling.
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Good luck! Hope it works out.
Making the choice to home school is a very nerve wracking but exciting decision! Each one of us has our own personal reasons for home schooling. Don’t let ANYone make you feel like you don’t know what is BEST for YOUR daughter.
You will do GREAT!
Congratulations on taking your first step into the wonderful world of homeschooling! It’s not always easy, but being a parent never is, this is no exception. But you’ve got a lot of tools available to you to help you along your journey. Hopefully you can find a homeschool group near you that will help you find local resources, have field trips, and gatherings that will give you and your daughter a well rounded experience!
If you need any help finding anything, just “Holla”!
You will do great!!!! I wish I could do it with my kids but me personally I don’t think I can teach them all they need to know…I will admit to not being very smart in some areas. If I knew I could teach them everything they need to kown I would do it, I really admire you and the other parents who homeschool!
School Secretaries have a notorious reputation for being like that, though this sounds more like a yard duty? Let the principal know that she is a partial reason for your choice–the pocketbook is where it hurts them the most and that might force some changes there because no kid should have to endure yelling like that.
I’ve been considering the home schooling route for a while with my daughter, but am continuing to keep her in public for now because I don’t think I can give her and my 2yo son enough attention while trying to do curriculum. I hear you on the reading thing, though. She’s got her recognition and can read a few words, but I don’t think she’ll be pushed further in any way for a few more years!
Pulling a stick for drinking water? OUTRAGEOUS. As a teacher, I’m appalled by the classroom management of that teacher. SO COMPLETELY WRONG and unhealthy for the students. I hope you do recommend that the other parents take this particular issue up with the principal for the health of the kids in the class.
Now I’m reall upset…=)
I really admire you for homeschooling your children. It takes a great deal of patience and knowledge to do so. You are a better mom than I am!
Lindsey Petersen
http://5kidswdisabilities.wordpress.co
You will not regret this decision! I was home schooled from 5th grade on and my husband and I plan to do the same with our three little ones when the time comes!
Good luck! I write about gifted kids being held back quite often on my blog. It is sadly very common.
Welcome to the world of homeschooling!! Thanks for submitting to this week’s Carnival of Homeschooling. Hope to see you around more!
I truly think making the decision to homeschool is one of the hardest parts of homeschooling. I remember agonizing and calling every homeschooler I knew about 7 years ago when we decided not to send our oldest child back to school for 1st grade. Making the decision was hard, homeschooling is sometimes hard, but I have never regretted the decision. Seven years later I am homeschooling my now 7th grade daughter, 5th grade son, and 3rd grade son. And, yes, my 3rd grader does a LOT more than learn how to read! Don’t let anyone tell you that you need some magical combination of personality qualities to homeschool – you don’t. I highly recommond http://www.hsclassroom.net for inspiration. It is a multi-authored blog and I recently wrote an article you might enjoy, “Oh, I could NEVER homeschool.” Blessings to you as you embark on what may be one of the greatest adventures of your life!
Samantha
I will ever be grateful that my parents pulled me out of “school” in fourth grade to homeschool me. That was back in the day that homeschooling wasn’t mainstream like today! And I’m sure it took a ton of courage for my parents. I went to a great school – and had no child-eaters to avoid. Still, being able to learn at my own speed and have some control of my education was hugely beneficial!
Best wishes on your new adventure!
Gina
Hi there! This is my first time here – I found you on the Carnival of Homeschoolers (welcome to the “club”).
It’s great you are taking the initiative to home educate your daughter. She sounds like a wonderful girl and she will certainly bloom even more so at home.
I just wanted to give a heads up about the other kids your daughter’s age, the ones that are not quite reading like her. A lot of kids take longer to develop the mental skills of decoding, blending, sounding words out – and it’s completely okay. Those so-called “late” readers will catch up in time, and when adults, we wouldn’t even be able to determine the difference between the two groups of readers. As a mom of one “late” boy, and a two “normal” kids, I know first hand what it’s like to watch a different kind of learner in action.
Anyway, sorry to hijack the comments for a bit. I wish you and your daughter well as you learn together. (I’m betting she doesn’t want to go back to public school. She’s going to like learning at home much better).
I can relate to a lot of what you’re saying. We homeschooled our oldest through the 2nd grade. Then he attended a charter school (bad experience for him) and then a public school (an even worst experience). My husband and I pulled him out of the 5th grade halfway through the school year for some of the same reasons that you described above.
Homeschooling has been challenging and a learning experience – for me, anyway. But I agree that it’s all about the children.
Good for you for doing what’s best for your child. I’m sure you’ll find lots of support online in your homeschooling journey.
Welcome to Homeschooling! congratulations for taking such a big step, we’ve always lived this way, but I can imagine how difficult it must be to stop what you are doing-what you expected to always be doing-and what everyone around you is doing- midstream, and do something so out of the box different.
As far as the school concentrating on reading..I would look into what subjects are on the yearly testing-that might explain why some subjects are not so important at the school.
The stick thing to go get a drink, not shocked here..I am homeschooling a friend’s son, he was in public school 1 year, I would pick him up after school. When the recess bell would ring, all the kids had to kneel on one knee wherever they are and remain like that till a teacher or yard duty person excused them to go line up. If the kids arrived at school before starting time, they were not allowed to play on the playground, but had to either sit on a bench and read/do schoolwork or walk in a line around a big square painted on the blacktop. Over and over, walking-not running, till the bell rang..or they sat down and read. It reminded me of a prison.
If you think there will not be any nasty personal backlash, I would let the principal know about the things that helped push you out the door, maybe as they lose the money, the school might look at changing things, maybe you could change things in a small positive way for the kids who are stuck there.
enjoy your homeschool journey, it is an amazing ride!
Bravo to you for rescuing your daughter! She deserves to be in an environment where she can fly and you are the best equipped to provide that for her. Way to go!
Congratulations for taking the step into homeschooling. It is certainly not the easiest path to take, but I am convinced it is the best path for children. I am sure there will be bumps in the road, but being committed to your responsibility as a parent to do the best thing for your child will get you through. Thanks for sharing!
We all have many reasons…
I came to notice that my son was spending more time out of the class room. He found the work quite easy and was sent to take the other children to the toilet (school policy – 2 for safety). He also took other kids to the sick room – he was the good kid that could be trusted – he was also very good at Math but was never given extension work. My daughter on the other hand takes a little longer to grasp concepts and I don’t think they were picking up on that, she would smile sweetly and nod – doesn’t mean that she had a clue!!!
We are enjoying our homeschooling season – this is our 3rd year – I’m not sure how long it will go for, so I am enjoying while it lasts.
Welcome to the wonderful world of homeschooling! I hope all goes well for you. The first year is tough as you get it all sorted out, but it does get easier and much better!
I always tell new homeschoolers to commit to homeschooling one year at a time. It is a grand ride!
We have homeschooled our four older children(ages 20, 22, 23, and 25) from K-12, except for the oldest, she went to PS kindergarten. We are currently homeschooling #5, 3rd grade-a typical overachiever, and #6, Pre-K with Down Syndrome. We have been on this journey for 19 years now and will be continuing for the next 12-15 years until the youngest completes her education.
If I have learned one thing homeschooling, it’s to take it a day at time, and not every child will learn the same exact way! Remember, no matter what, it’s what you do with what you have and never give up! I have always known no matter what I did or didn’t do, my children’s homeschool education is still better than what the schools in my area offer.
Oh, and to answer all the questions about college, take the ACT/SAT and have a transcript showing your completed high school program (check with your state’s requirements regarding graduation), and most colleges will accept the homeschooled student. All four of our older children have attended/are attending or have completed their higher education and ALL are gainfully employed.
I say all this to say, You will NOT regret your decision!
It is really interesting to get the back story. I told you that I taught both high school and K, and I would do the EXACT same thing. We are not inclined to home school our children, but teachers and adults that work in the school can have a profound effect on children. And not all of them are good, like you pointed out. You are doing an awesome job and I can’t wait to hear further success stories!
I totally udnerstand what you are feeling and why you are chosing to homeschool. I homeschooled my daughter last year via Cyberschool. It was academically challenging and I was able to adapt lessons to meet her needs. I sent her to school this year, because I thought that it would be too hard to teach 2nd grade, Kindergarten to my younger child, and take care of a new baby. Now I’m thinking about trying homeschooling again next year- not happy with school and social experiences at all. We’ll see- need to pray about it. Good luck to you!
Jen
Creative and Curious Kids!
http://raisingcreativeandcuriouskids.blogspot.com
That sort of stuff is happening at your dd’s school and you have people questioning you about pulling her out??
W.
T.
F?
Re: college, some kids have taken courses at their community college and then applied to university as a transfer student. Works out quite well because transfer students are viewed more favorably since they’ve demonstrated they can do college-level work.
Congratulations!We are in our first year of homeschooling and I can only say it was the BEST decision we ever made for our son. I hope you love it as much as we have.
I was interested to read your blog.
As a parent, you may be eligible to be part of a university study about how kids think about other people’s thinking. We will ask you to watch with your child three brief, online videos of puppet actors and then to record your child’s answers to questions about what the puppets are thinking. We will also ask you some general questions about yourself, your child, and your household. Participation would take less than 15 minutes, and it’s a great way for you and your child to contribute to our knowledge of how children think. For more details go to the following address:
http://www.milestoneshome.org/current/thinking/
Best wishes,
Kimberly
Yeah, I go back and forth. Not sure I could handle it, but I hate the way public schools are all about testing now and it seems all they do is try to get the kids to past the tests.
good for you, you and your daughter will do great. I thought about doing the same with Sam but she needs the school atmosphere.
First, I think that you are doing the right thing for your daughter and your family. It is sad that she is “being held back” but I am sure that it is not intentional. I am a former third grade teacher (turned SAHM) who taught in a “not so great” school district. Though it’s really hard not to move on after a concept/lesson/idea has been taught, you do have to take the masses into consideration. If the majority of the students are not grasping a concept then to move on would be hurtful to them, much in the way that not moving on is hurtful to your daughter. However, in my district we had challenge programs for children like your daughter who understood concepts/lessons right away and were ready to move on. It’s a shame that your daughter did not have these opportunities in her school. Maybe a lack of funding?
Either way, I do agree that you are doing the right thing. I just wanted to point out that it’s not the teacher’s fault if s/he is not moving on to the next topic. You must take into consideration what the majority of the students need.
Good luck on your homeschooling journey!